Shane Grimm, a zoning and planning consultant who also serves as a caregiver for his mother, recently spoke about the difficulties of managing his parents' affairs. He left his previous government job to handle their legal and personal matters, now running his own business to allow time for these responsibilities.
Grimm described the past year as "very draining" and "challenging," noting he learned significant life experiences from the situation. He highlighted that society often avoids discussions about death and its emotional and financial implications, though he acknowledged finances are a reality in such circumstances.
He explained that his father passed away quickly, making conversations about affairs impossible, while his mother has had dementia for about a decade, preventing meaningful discussions. This lack of communication made organizing bank accounts, investments, and other assets particularly difficult.
Grimm utilized an attorney from his previous government career who held his parents' will. Because his mother was not of sound mind to sign a power of attorney, he had to pursue guardianship through the courts, a process he described as "very long and time-consuming." He eventually obtained guardianship over his mother's affairs.
As one of three children, Grimm communicated with his siblings about these matters. His brother initially planned to handle responsibilities but runs an automotive business and lacks experience with attorneys, so Grimm took on the role. He now manages both his father's estate work and his mother's guardianship.
With court approval for conservative investments due to dementia care costs, Grimm worked with a financial planner recommended by his attorney. These investments have performed fairly well to offset his mother's care expenses.
Grimm emphasized key takeaways: have early and frequent conversations with parents about their affairs, and ensure all documents and account information are accessible. He stressed that without this preparation, significant time and money would be spent on attorneys to untangle estate or guardianship administration.